Kicking Imposter Syndrome’s Ass

This weekend ended up being massive for me as far as the new website goes.

I spent all day Saturday working on it, and I made a lot of huge leaps forward.

I erased a lot of things that I felt were unnecessary and no longer fit what I wanted on the website. Found some redundancies that I could nix, and made like 4 new pages. FOUR NEW PAGES.

This new site is going to be so incredible. I’m so excited for it.

I wrangled my friend Angie into talking me through some things last Friday so that I could figure out what the hell I’m doing. I hadn’t spoken to her in such a long long time, but she’s been doing online work for years and her website was on the same platform I’m building mine, so I was like… heeyyyyyyyyy girl hey, let me pick your brains. We ended up chatting for over an hour about life and the website and my feelings and thoughts and ideas, and then I showed her my site-in-progress, and she was blown away. I was so glad for it because I low-key was like “what if it’s terrible? What if the changes I made destroyed it?” but it’s definitely well on it’s way to being perfect and I’m super excited.

I even got her to join Valkyrie Squad this weekend so she could see what kind of training I’ve been up to.

I also added an application so that I could post my own workout videos. Which is both nerve wracking as hell and incredibly exciting, because that’s a huge first step in the direction of an Online Personal Trainer. I have three program ideas that I want to put together, and I’m really excited about them.

I set up a booking calendar so that in the future I can get receive clients online for meetings, interviews, and consultations.

And then I made a three page long list of articles and things that I need to write and work up to be published on the site as well. One of them I completed on Saturday evening, but I have my work cut out for me for sure. I feel like I’m actually on top of my plan though. I went back and double checked on my 3 phase layout for moving over to the new site, and I’m halfway through phase 2 already! I thought I was still chasing down phase 1 tasks, so finding myself farther ahead than I thought really helped boost me through some of the nervousness I was feeling about it before.

Imposter Syndrome is a bitch.

I can’t believe I let fear take over for such a long time. I talk a big game about not letting your head get the better of you, but I get trapped in that cycle of thinking I can’t, or I’m not good enough, or knowledgeable enough, or just not enough of something to be able to take on my dreams and goals. I let it hold me back a lot. But every single time I push through, I prove to myself over and over again that I can handle it, I can do it, I can achieve it. I just have to freaking TRY.

Insert Yoda Meme here. “There is no try, only do.”

And ultimately that’s what I want to bring to the table of the people who will work with me. I want to prove to them, to help them prove to themselves, that they absolutely freaking can do that thing.

Sunday I spent a few hours on Canva, and going over my brand guide and the templates I have, and then moved a lot of them into my email so that I could have them available to use as I need them. I need to figure out how to move them from canva to the website as well so that I have them all in one space. I might email Kyla about that to see if she knows more than I do, because I’m winging it over here.

I also spent all Sunday doing Mobility work because my cycle finally ended and I was feeling really stiff and sore all over with the rain and the complete sloth mode I was committed to last week. Sometimes a period body just doesn’t want to do shit but sit still and drink warm comfort drinks. And that’s exactly what I did for most of the 5 days of my period. My hips were a mess, my spine was crunchy, and my quads and hammies were full of knots.

I actually ended up foam rolling of my own free will, without the Mother of Valkyries scolding me about it first. I feel the twinge of growth tugging on my being. I am the amoeba evolving into something more. That’s the second time this month it’s happened, and my brain is struggling to understand why I would do such a thing unprovoked. But I felt incredible each time I got up after foam rolling, so maybe, just maybe, this is another leg of evolution standing up.